Sunday, April 27, 2008

Disturbed, to say the least


I have a friend (yeah, yeah, I have lots of friends, but I'm not talking about them here & now). I've known her since my divorce - met her at belly dance class. She seemed so....together, when I was so....falling apart. I was trying to do something for me, after sublimating for too long. Something that would make me feel like a woman. (Nothing like someone you've loved for 11 years looking you in the eye and telling you that you are not attractive to make you feel like worm poop). Women have been doing this for years, dancing more for each other.....some people think the dance form is vulgar, and it can be, but it's not meant to. Anyway, I loved it - and I love balancing a sword on my head.

Back on track: this woman has helped lots of people. She's kind, and funny, and talented. She goes off on tangents now and then, but we all have our quirks. A couple years ago she was terrified of avian flu, and was CONVINCED she and her family would be heading for the hills at any moment, when the worldwide pandemic hit Redding. She stockpiled food, and researched places to go.

Now, I spent my high school years with foster parents who just happened to be LDS. Members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Mormons. Yeah. Anything you want to know? Just ask me. We stored food. All the time - one to two years worth. Partly in case of WORLD WAR, and partly, just because it's a good idea. You never know when someone is going to get sick, or lose a job, and just knowing that you have 200 lbs. of wheat and rice is so comforting. After all, those CARBS will soothe the depression of knowing the world is coming to an end, right? I actually know how to make hard tack, and fruit leather, and jerky, because they keep well. Living in a house with upwards of 20 people, and the amount of food we needed just to get through a day, with food storage on top of this meant that we had food EVERYWHERE. A huge pantry, as big as my kitchen is now. Food under beds, and in closets. In the storage shed.

So I really didn't think that was so weird.

But now she's posted a bulletin on MySpace that reads,

"I am planning on taking on some combat training this Summer starting with Boot Camp in May and then on to the shooting range starting first week of June. Anyone with me? I am seeing this as a necessity. If you are interested, contact me.

A well regul
ated militia, being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed." --Second Amendment to the U.S. Constitution"

Now, I think the Constitution is a wonderful thing.

But, forgive me. Maybe I seem cold and callous, but if something were to happen that required me to shoot someone to feed me and my kids, I would rather starve. Yes, you really read that. I've shot guns before - it's rather fun. But to shoot a person? I couldn't do it. EVEN IF MY CHILDREN AND I DIED BECAUSE I WOULDN'T SHOOT SOMEONE.

Maybe it's because I'm not afraid of what comes after this life. Maybe it's because I've seen too many people die. Maybe it's because I would forever feel guilty and ashamed. Maybe I'd wonder if that other person didn't need my stuff more than I did. Maybe it's because I'm too busy trying to live my life, and raise my kids, and do my small insignificant part to try and make this a better place. A kinder place. A more welcoming and loving place. I don't do it well, but I can try.


2 comments:

Hal Johnson said...

I'm sort of a half-baked "soft-core survivalist." That is, I believe in preparing for something like a big earthquake that would interrupt supply lines for three or four weeks.

But when I think about the possibility of the utter end of civilization, I wonder if I'd want to be around. Surviving ain't necessarily living.

B.Rubble said...

Annie-Hal. Well put, both arguments. Allow me to share mine if you would?

With regard to food storing. Annie, I don't care what religion, color, creed, race, sex, etc anyone person maybe. If the world is ending and you have food saved and mine doesn't? Well heeellllo friend! I don't think thats weird at all. And as for knowing how to make "roadfood" that is almost a lost art/knowledge. We as a species don't have generational memory (Lucky Gorillas) so we have to learn things from our elders. My Grandfather instilled in me a sense of how to take care of me n mine should the "balloon" go up. I can make wild salad no problem. Can pick out the safe mushrooms, have set traplines, hunted just about everything on this continent worth eating/wearing, and can make a mean lean-to if need be. If I have time and lumber, I'll put up a decent cabin, but I dont do "custom" work..lol

I'm more of the "Die on your feet than live on your knees" camp with regards to survival-ism. I don't belong to, nor subscribe to, and militia nor federation, but there is a group of folks I know that are mostly military, or their families, and there are several meeting places, in case of need, up in the hills all up and down this state. There are jobs given, communities founded, and would you believe, an actual plan of "battle" should the need to defend ourselves occur? I don't want to shoot someone. I don't like shooting people. I don't look forward to violence of any sort. However, I have NO PROBLEM whatsoever, with defending my family, my home, and my property. Not a one. Now, that being said, You'd be right if you assumed that shooting someone requires a firearm of one sort or the other. Now, you don't hand any ol' person a firearm and send em on their way. They may ventilate you on accident. I've been trained in pistol/rifle/shotgun. I've been trained in small unit tactics. I've been trained in all these things, and hope I never have to use those skills. However. If need be, I will defend me n mine to the death. Yours or mine, yours prefferably. (Not you, Annie, but anyone who would...you get that) However, it sounds as if you're disturbed as if this is something you wouldn't expect from this friend. If you think something is fishy, then call her. See what the dealy-yo is. If she's in the midst of something negative, you can help.