Wish I coulda been there

My daughter spends Friday nights with her dad and step-mother. Actually, so does my son, and they actually spend Wednesday through Friday nights with them, and while this information has absolutely nothing to do with this story, it...well, has nothing to do with this story. My daughter's step-mom loves to do her shopping at the big, unnamed store I will no longer venture into. While no one sane is actually at the store. Or awake. My daughter goes with her because she can usually get a new lipgloss out of the deal. Last Saturday, their schedule changed, and the step-mom (we'll call her MKSM to preserve her privacy), her grown daughter, twin toddler grandchildren, and my daughter were at the store sometime a little later. Their party split, with my daughter staying with MKSM and one of the twins, and MKSM's daughter with the other twin. MKSM's cell phone rang. She didn't have her reading glasses with her (really? How can you read labels?) so she handed the cell phone to my 9yo daughter. "Em, can you read this for me?" It was a text from her grown daughter. With perfect enunciation, she loudly read: "I'm in the shitter by the shoes." Tweet